Well my pribbling fool-born minnows, today is a good day for sharpening the pointed ends of our tongues. Today is a good day for Shakespearean insults.
But isn’t every day, really?
Among Shakespeare’s talents was his ability to coin creative forms of abuse. Where would we be without his savagery? It is all too easy to fall into vocabulary ruts, so this January I’m exploring several Shakespeare Insult Generators. Lore says that in 1996, English teacher Jerry Maguire came up with a format for creating insults that are Shakespeare-like. You can still see his original “Insult Kit” today. Over the past 20 years, however, technology has changed, and now insult generators are a bit fancier than Maguire’s lists. Because everyone needs a bit of lightness in their day, I’ve shared a few of my favorites below.
(There is a 90% chance that I have said something truly terrible in this post and don’t know it. If I have, forgive me and let me know.)
The highlight of these generators is, for me, the PanGloss Shakespeare Insult Generator. It combines randomly generated barbs with lines from Shakespeare’s works, which means visitors can read phrases like “[Thou art] like the toad, ugly and venomous” from As You Like It and “You are as a candle, the better burnt out” from Henry IV, part 2 alongside random lines like “Thou paunchy earth-vexing apple-john.” The site has also been floating around the internet since 1996, so it is a modern classic of sorts.
If you are a much cooler person than I am, there is also a Shakespeare Insult Generator app. I have never used it, but it looks like a good way to find ye olde insults on the run.
For those of you who like your insults to have a bit more heft, Barry Kraft has published a book of cards that help people create their own insults. I am fonder of the generators found on the internet, but the book could be a great addition to classrooms that want their students to embody the spirit of Shakespeare’s time.
So go forth, my roguish hasty-witted vassals, and malign your friends. (But do so kindly.)
Yes! There is no insult greater, malicious or simple banter, than that of a Shakespearean barb laced with such sweet and sour wit.
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Ha! Very true.
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love this.
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Ah yes. I used to do this with my English classes. It was always a hit! Thanks Kristen:)
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It does seem like it would be good for students in particular! They can’t help but engage with it.
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Ha! I love this!!! Thanks, Kristen. I went to the Shakespeare insult generator and noticed that they have a Fantasy Insult Generator. Yay! It’s hard to make up insults for anyone who’s tried. I use the Foul-o-Matic quite a bit http://foulomatic.hnldesign.nl/ It’s worth the laugh and nothing to download.
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That’s fabulous! The more insults the better, I always say. 😉
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What a great post. I’ve been struggling with coining insults for my fantasy novel. Time to get my Shakespearion.
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Fantasy insults can be a such a struggle! I hope you come up with a few that you like.
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Perhaps I’ll tweet some of Shakespeare’s insults. 😊
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It’s great fun – and just shows his wit and sparkling ability with words…
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It definitely does!
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Fantastic. I recently learnt Twerp means pregnant fish! An interesting insult if ever I heard one 🙂
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That is wonderful! It is so interesting when words have meanings that we don’t know about.
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Reblogged this on Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog and commented:
Amaze your friends and perplex your enemies with your Shakespearean Repartee – Then run away as fast as you can 😄😄😄
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Reblogged this on strangegoingsonintheshed and commented:
Another gem I came across today. Much fun and wickedness will entail methinks…
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Love Shakespearean barbs, but I wonder if my colleagues would GET it!
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That is always the danger. Sometimes knowing your audience can be a difficult feat!
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When I spent time at the Folger Hamlet Academy a couple of years ago our instructor had do a Bard”compliment” session. With insults people usually laugh. With compliments they go “awww.” Very fun way to introduce students to Shakespeare.
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That does sound like a great exercise. I’m sure everyone was very engaged!
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My random result: “Thou ruttish, full-gorged codpiece!” What fun! Lol
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Ha! Very good.
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Reblogged this on mira prabhu and commented:
Shakespeare didn’t hold back, did he? Here are a couple of randomly generated barbs with lines from his works: “[Thou art] like the toad, ugly and venomous” from As You Like It and “You are as a candle, the better burnt out” from Henry IV…thanks for sharing a great post, Kristen Wardowski!
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I do love Shakespearean insults but I think they are at least matched by Rabelaisian insults. Some of the insults in the English translation of Pantagruel are hilarious!
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There needs to be an insult battle between Shakespeare lovers and Rabelaisists. I would enjoy it!
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Reblogged this on The Owl Lady.
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Reblogged this on Archer's Aim and commented:
Sounds like a good way to create insults and quips in my fantasy writing.
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Lovely post, Kristen. It is amazing how many contemporary terms and phrases can be traced back to the great Bard!
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It really is fascinating. I feel like I’m always learning of various words and phrases that he created.
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Thank you for this! I hopped over from P.H. Solomon’s blog. I always love a good Shakespearean insult, and had no idea there were phone apps. I just downloaded one! 🙂
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Welcome! I’m glad that you found your way here. It is always good to see new faces.
I hope the app works well! Those things can always be so hit or miss.
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Reblogged this on Kate McClelland.
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Love Shakespearean insults, so witty & sarcastic
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They can be grand!
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This is such an awesome article. How I wish I had one of these insult generators back in my college days.
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They would have been handy, wouldn’t they?
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Haha! This is awesome! 😀 I always try to use larger words to make myself sound eloquent and better educated (which I can’t do in my fiction writing because I write dystopian worlds. >.> Way to shoot myself in the face with that one,) but these would definitely up the insult value. Thanks for sharing!
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They are fun little generators! I may or may not have annoyed a friend this week by sending him line after line of Shakespearean insults. Ah, well!
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Haha! Gotta enjoy the little things.
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This. Is. Awesome!
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I had a way too much fun with it.
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This is precious, Kristen. I’m bookmarking those sites. No telling when my writing will take me to merry old England, or a Shakespearean English class.
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They really are wonderful to play with!
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I can’t remember many Shakespeare quotes, but two stick in my mind because they used to make us laugh in school: “The Devil damn thee black, though cream-faced loon! Where gottest thou that goose look?” and “What, you egg? Young fry of treachery!” I think they might have been from Hamlet. Or Macbeth. Or both.
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Ha! They are both wonderful. I don’t use serious insults often, but Shakespeare does make me want to get more creative about them.
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